This weekend I went to LA Live. LA Live isn't really anything, but even though it is nothing, it opened this last month. It's about half an acre of wide open space in the middle of downtown LA. The empty space is surrounded by lights,advertisements,three massive sports bars, and a Starbucks. It is a flaunt of prime real estate. A laugh at everyone who could think of something better to do with a half an acre of land next to two of the largest tourist attractions in downtown, the Staples Center and the LA Convention Center. Yet, still there is something attractive about the lights and space that sucks you in. I felt like a mosquito headed toward a bug zapper, like completely acting on instinctive attraction to sparkly lights and clean lines.

This picture doesn't do the emptiness justice. LA Live,the wide open space, is behind me betwixt all the massive lights.

I just got back from an Art Garfunkel concert in this random place called Rancho Cucamonga about an hour away.  As I was driving there, I started getting very sleepy. I never nodded off, but I could tell my eyes were getting heavy. I was like, "Uh oh, bad news to be almost asleep while heading to see a guy who sings lullabies for a living."   Had to pull off and get me a 2 pump Grande white-mocha from Starbucks and some dry Chinese food. 

The concert was swell. I was in the 2 percentile of people there under the age of 50. I know I missed a bunch of before-my-time jokes. Who is Alan Freed by the way?

He sang a few Simon and Garfunkel songs. Found myself missing the harmonies :( but was pleasantly surprised that his voice was still as soft, smooth, and lilting as ever.  He's not a song writer. So he sang songs written by the greats as well as songs written by friends of his. He sang only one that he wrote himself, and it wasn't very good. We all know that vocalists are only part musician.

Only the classic Simon and Garfunkel songs got any real excited applause with complimentary vocal hoots and hollers. You could tell he got good-naturedly irritated by the fact that all his other material wasn't as appreciated. But I see his side; I hate incessantly repetitive stuff, and he's been singing Sound Of Silence since he was 22.

One time during a song, he was walking around stage, letting the guitarist and keyboardist jam, he absentmindedly set his microphone down and kept walking, when it was time for him to start singing again, he walked up to the empty microphone stand and looked a little stunned.  He had to run to the back of the stage to pick up the mike he had set down. His backup performers were flawless and collectively smoothed right over the gaffe as if there were always 4 extra measures before the chorus of that one song.  I laughed out loud as did Funkel. 

Good show over all. Glad I went.

I've always felt one of my greatest weaknesses in the work environment is - arguing and disagreeing effectively while still maintaining good relationships with coworkers.

Lately, I've learned a trick I've been using at work that has made SUCH a difference in my ability to get people to do what I want. 

Say a coworker says, "I'm saying something really stupid about a choice I am making on this project "

Previously, I would have said in a panicked voice: "No, no you are wrong because of these three reasons right hmyeahr."

NOW, I say instead: "Mmmmmm...If we choose to go in that direction, the implications of that choice are: Reason 1, Reason 2, Reason 3."

So before I was telling whomever that they were wrong. I was saying the conclusion I wanted the person to draw (their wrongness) right at the beginning of my sentence - immediately putting the opposing person on the defensive. It also puts the attack of the idea on the person instead of on the idea. The words 'You are wrong' are emotionally heavy. Nobody wants to be wrong, and people will fight not to appear wrong.

NOW in my NEW approach, I'm NOT stating the conclusion I want them to draw(their wrongness)outright. I'm not even telling them at all my personal opinion about the quality of their choice or whether or not the choice is a valid option. . NO NEGATIVE PRESSURE on them at all to change their mind. I am simply saying the implications of the choice (completely objectively), and MOST of the time, the person will draw the conclusion(they were wrong) all my their lonesome. It also puts the attack on the idea itself instead of on the person generating the idea. The person is able to abandon their idea without ever feeling like they were stupid; they are abandoning the idea because they, themselves, have come to the conclusion that the negative implications of that direction are too significant.

I have used this battle tactic on like most of the people at work with GREAT results. I get people to agree with me in less time than EVER BEFORE. And everybody walks away happy with all egos intact :) 

VARIATION ON THE THEME:

Person: "Ginger, Do This"

Me 1st option: "I can't do that because you've given me all this other stuff to do, and I don't have time. (Telling them they have made a bad choice)"

Me 2nd NEW option: "Sure no problem; I'll get started right away. I have these two other things that I am working on. Which one of those things should I stop working on to make room for this new thing (No Judgement, Only presenting the implication)?"

So went skiing. Decided to put my ski boots on while sitting down. Strapped them on real tight, stood up and walked 100 yards. SOOOOO much pain. My soles were not touching the bottoms off my boots and my calves where trying to drip through the boot vise like sand in an hourglass. Ahhhhh. That's what got me the most sore out of our two day trip to Mount Rose in Reno, which by the way had its busiest day EVER on the Saturday we went. And still no more than a 3 minute wait at lift lines.  Highly recommend this place called Mt Rose. Just imagine how great this place must be on it's regular days!!

Also, of note. Golfing. At the Grand Sierra Resort and Casino. The sis is a complete natural. Tell a girl how to hold a club and ur fighting for your right to be alpha.

mmmm... 1000 thread count white sheets. Best Christmas present EVER!!!! I feel like a princess.

I've decided I don't want new items in my life. Not enough room for new things in my apartment. Instead, I am only getting myself the SAME things I already have only better quality. Would way rather have 2 nice sets of sheets than 10 mediocre sets of sheets.